Allergy plan

In light of the recent discovery that F has a corn allergy, I’m having a little mini-panic over what the F (haha, get it?) we are all going to be able to eat around here. I mean, I know we’re still a long way from having complete lists of what F can and can’t eat. Just because he doesn’t react to something through my breast milk doesn’t mean he will be able to eat it safely himself. And just because he reacts to something through my breast milk now, doesn’t mean he won’t outgrow that particular allergy in the near future. BUT still, I’m a planner and my head is spinning over how I’m going to tackle this from a family perspective.

G can and does eat everything. I can eat everything but am a lifelong vegetarian because I don’t like meat and I’m not changing that because eww. B can eat everything but dairy and soy. F can eat, well, I have no idea but likely not much. So far his no’s (through breast milk) are dairy, rice, apple, and corn. His yesses (also through breast milk) are squash, potato, banana, pear, coconut, peanuts, chocolate, wheat, egg white, almond, and date.

One thing is for sure, before F is mobile we will ditch B's Pinteresty rice construction site in favor of a quinoa one. The corn filled bean bags are already gone.

One thing is for sure, before F is mobile we will ditch B’s Pinteresty rice construction site in favor of a quinoa one. The corn filled bean bags are already gone.

There is no way to visualize feeding us all as we go forward that isn’t messy. Here are the only ideas I have so far:

-Do we do some sort of lowest common denominator paleo vegan and air diet? There really isn’t much left that we can all eat.

-So maybe we have a sort of lowest common denominator diet where we keep meat for everyone else? I’m already cooking bacon regularly and have actually touched salmon without puking so I’m half way there and I’m already surviving on pure peanut butter so whatever.

-If we go that route, would it work to have foods that B can have but F can’t that we reserve only for school lunches that he eats away from home? Or is that too confusing for a kid?

-Or do we all have individualized meal plans? Everyone can have their own special cabinet and space in the fridge like roommates? Not only does that seem like a shopping and cooking nightmare, but how do I protect F, and to some degree B, from foods that can hurt them? And how do I explain to them that they can’t eat things others are eating?

-Then what do we do when we travel? Eating out will be impossible so do we restrict ourselves to places with hippie grocery stores and hotels with kitchens? What about when people visit our house? Do we put them on our crazy diet or allow forbidden allergens and just somehow manage them so F doesn’t get his hands on things?

Or do we just keep him permanently strapped in somewhere away from all food?

Or do we just keep him permanently strapped in somewhere away from all food until he leaves for college?

On the one hand it doesn’t seem fair (and maybe not safe) to F to keep foods in the house that he can’t have. But on the other, it doesn’t seem fair for B to have to heavily restrict his diet, especially given he has had some weight gain and growth issues. The last thing I want to do is limit his food!

Does anybody have any ideas or experience with a situation like this? No need to suggest that I hide in the closet and binge on ice cream and cheese after the kids go to bed. As soon as I stop nursing, that will be an integral part of any plan we choose.

The thing about parenting

There are a lot of things about parenting. None of them are surprises because people talk about them all the time. But then somehow they are all surprises because no matter how much you hear about them these parenting things are things you have to experience for yourself. Or at least I do.

It didn’t take long after B was born for me to conclude that he was the greatest human in history. Or at least in my eyes. I thought he truly was the perfect kid for me. Not because he was my kid and I was supposed to think that, but because I felt like all of his traits meshed so perfectly with mine. He was soooo sensitive and inquisitive, which was perfect! We could explore and learn and talk about things together! He had such biiiig feelings and was capable of such love, we would have the best bond and he would stay by my side! I had this sense that he was going to do great things with all of his intensity and be a really challenging, but truly amazing person (sort of like his father!)

This picture epitomizes his babyhood to me. "OMG the grocery store is so f'ing exciting yet simultaneously painfully overwhelming I can't stand it!"

This picture epitomizes his babyhood to me. “OMG the grocery store is so f’ing exciting yet simultaneously painfully overwhelming I can’t stand it!”

Ok two pictures epitomize his babyhood. "I will only concede to shut my eyes for brief periods if I am snuggled in silent, immobile, maternal warmth."

Ok two pictures epitomize his babyhood. “I will only concede to shut my eyes for brief periods if I am snuggled in silent, immobile, maternal warmth.”

Years went by (sniff) and I still thought/think he is the perfect human, he continues to have all of those traits, and I was right about all of the ways our relationship would grow and be great. He is challenging and I think he will continue to be, but he has the best heart and cares more deeply for people than I ever thought a little person could. He is so intense in everything he does and I think in some ways he makes things harder for himself than they need to be, but the flip side of that is I think he is really going to achieve great things.

Not much has changed.

Not much has changed.

When I was pregnant with F I worried. All the standard stuff. How would I ever love another baby as much as B, blah blah. But on top of that I had already concluded that B was perfect for me. I truly thought B was the only blueprint for a child that I could get along with and enjoy. There was a good chance the next baby wouldn’t be the same as B so therefore he would not be perfect for me.

I’m sure everyone knows where this is going, because like I said this is one of those things and we’ve all heard parents say it over and over again. But it is still really surprising me to feel it happen. (<- It would be reasonable to conclude at this point that I’m really dumb.)

Then along came this.

Then along came this.

Somehow despite the logical impossibility of it all, F is also the perfect human and perfect for me. He is so chill and so happy that he actually makes me more that way. I can be in a fit of stress (probably about his allergies or his brother) and out of nowhere he just randomly smiles and flails all of his limbs in full body glee and I am instantly more relaxed. He will wake himself up by rolling over in his crib and be somewhat perturbed about it, until a person shows up to peek in at him and he breaks out in full body joy just because you showed up. It’s awesome.

Oh hai!

Oh hai!

He is also so adaptable! B is not this way and nor am I, but somehow watching F just roll with things makes me calmer about change too. (Still waiting for that one to rub off on B…) Who knows who F will turn out to be but it feels like he is going to be one of those people that is just easy. Easy to get along with and easy to be around and one of those people who can thrive in any situation. He’ll be one of those people who will have a million friends because who doesn’t like someone like that? I don’t mean to say he’s going to coast through life without issue (he won’t be able to eat anything for example) but I just think he’s going to make things look easy and have friends wherever he goes. (Yeah, I know he’s only 3 months old, let’s just roll with this for now.) Basically he’s perfect too.

I don’t know what I’m trying to conclude here, I love my kids? Isn’t that obvious? I think it’s just really fascinating to me how different they are already and how I can simultaneously love them for them despite that fact. I think even though I heard people talk about this phenomenon I thought they were lying to me and themselves a little bit. I thought there would be things I wished were different about them or I’d like one more than the other for some reason or something. But it’s not working out that way. They are perfect and I actually love them for the people they truly are. Who knew?? Oh yeah, everybody knew.

My favorite picture of my favorite people.

My favorite picture of my favorite people.


The worst allergy

Dramatic title! Actually the worst allergy is definitely some sort of severe, life-threatening IgE mediated allergy to something really common. Like the kind where you’re so allergic to peanuts that you can’t even sit in an airplane seat where someone ate peanuts 3 days ago without fearing for your life. (So far) we don’t have anything like that (yaaaaay!) and for that I’m very thankful.

K, now after that brief attempt to maintain perspective and be positive, I’ll complain again. We just discovered F has the worst allergy there is (except for all of those mentioned above that are way worse.) He is allergic to corn.

Thanks to lobbyists or GMOs or something evil and politically charged I’m sure, corn is in EVERYTHING. Skipping corn on the cob, corn tortillas, Tostitos, popcorn, etc. doesn’t really break my heart. BUT corn is also in everything else, I mean truly everything. Every time you see some unrecognizable ingredient like ascorbic acid, calcium citrate, caramel color, dextrose, etc. etc. there is a 99% chance that thing is from corn. Aaaaand because corn is not a top 8 allergen, manufacturers aren’t required to list it. You know how at the end of an ingredient list a product will say “contains: wheat, soy, tree nuts” or something like that? No? No one else reads those? Well regardless, you’ll never see corn on that list. So pretty much unless a packaged food has purely recognizable ingredients (like Larabars!!!) then we’ll have to assume it has corn and move on.

Aaaaaand guess what else has corn? Hypoallergenic formulas!!! We have to get our hands on the one form of the one brand of elemental stuff that doesn’t contain corn. It’s basically space food. (I’m not switching to formula now, I would just like to have something on hand in case something happens to me or I’m not around for some reason. It’s kind of scary to be the sole source of non-poisonous food for F.)

Oh, guess what else corn is in! Medicine. And vitamins. Yup.

I’ll leave the bitching there. At this point we don’t know how sensitive F is to corn and when and if he will outgrow it so I don’t want to be too dramatic (too late). As with all of these other allergens, the scary thing is what will happen when/if he directly ingests the food rather than getting it through me. Right now we have appointments with two allergists but can’t see the guy who is supposedly the Utah “expert” on FPIES because our insurance doesn’t cover him. (Depending on what the first two say I may try to push them to cover him as a specialist or whatever, not sure yet. Help, Obama!)

The next thing I have to do is learn how to cook, eek, as eating out or eating anything prepared or packaged is out of the question for the next year? Two years? 18 years?

The trip that wasn’t

B has never been a good traveler. In fact if I were to sum up this blog in a few words it would be, B sucks at sleeping and travel. Or at least that’s my own impression. Perhaps to a more observant reader this blog would be summed up as, wow this lady really never learns does she?

So on that note, this past week while G was out of town, my mom and I thought we would take the boys on a little road trip. (It’s cute to say “the boys” so I did, but really the trip was for B, since F would be happiest staying home and watching the ceiling fan.) We packed up the car and hit the road to Ogden, UT! (That sounds cute again, but really what happened was I spent 48 f-ing hours packing because, first of all kids, but second of all due to all of our allergies now I had to pack every.single.morsel that would be consumed by anyone on the trip.)

We planned to stay two nights while exploring the town, and mainly visiting their children’s museum and … train museum! We figured the latter would be the best thing that ever happened to B.

Enough with the foreshadowing, I’ll just come out and say it. He.was.a.nightmare. I gave him one job before we left, packing toys, which he usually enjoys. But this time he melted down over every aspect of the task. He couldn’t find his suitcase, then he couldn’t open it, then it wasn’t big enough for what he wanted to pack, then I suggested another bag and he lost his mind, then I suggested packing smaller things and he lost his mind, on and on… you know the drill… toddler blah blah… Let’s just say the tone for the trip was set.

Don't be fooled by the smile.

Don’t be fooled by the smile.

The car ride continued much the same way, with some brief quiet iPad moments interspersed¬† in there, thank you Steve Jobs. When we got to the hotel he perked up a bit and I found myself becoming hopeful. Big mistake. Never have hope. We unloaded the 75,000 tons of cargo including my precious Keurig machine (because you never know what’s in natural flavoring at hotel coffee and we wouldn’t want an allergic reaction!) B was no help, of course, but also no hindrance. That is, of course, until we got everything into the hotel room and he asked where the toys were. Ummm you packed them. Noooooo not those toys, the toys they leave in the hotel room!!! Oh boy. So we were back to throwing ourselves on the floor and generally flailing and screaming.

Up until that point, I had tried responding with patient love and kindness, or at least silently cursing in my head while ignoring the behavior. But after a good 30 minutes of hotel meltdown, which was the cap on the previous 4 hours of meltdown, I finally threw out some version of, “Get your act together or I’m turning this car right around!” We all turn into parental stereotypes at some point.


Representative tantrum picture.

My threats had no effect so I gave him a choice. Toddlers love choices! Control! We are going to the children’s museum or the train museum right now. You pick. He picked children’s museum and said he wanted to walk. I said we couldn’t walk because it was raining. 10 more minutes of screaming as we forced everyone into the car, during which time he changed his mind to the train museum. Fine.whatever. We are here for you and you.will.enjoy.this.g-dammit!


We arrived at the train museum where they have huge real locomotives parked outside of the building!!! Again, I felt my hopes rising. We might have a good mood coming and this trip might become fun! Hahahaha. Stupid. He breezed right past the trains without care and we went straight to the ticket counter to purchase admission. They had these little dinky pull back train toys sitting there and B said he wanted to buy one and go home. Again, I displayed my stupidity as I didn’t just listen to the kid who was giving me excellent advice.

I bought our tickets and forced F into the ergo which he love/hates. (Oh yeah! He was there too. He was mostly an angel, or at least he was in comparison. I really have no idea if he was easy or a pain because his troubles didn’t even register.) As we entered the museum F did a giant puke which mostly landed in my shoe. I couldn’t actually bend over to clean it so I had to hobble around with a puke foot until I found my mom to help.

While on the search, I noticed that the museum happens to be 10000% for adults. There are no fun kiddie train things, just black and white pictures of people constructing the railroad long ago and placards with historical tidbits about the influence of the railroad on modern society. Every other patron was over the age of 60. I was pretty much about to just lie down on the floor at that point when I heard childlike screams of glee (not from my kid). Thankfully the museum has two model trains that were going, and that’s where the only other kids in the entire place are. Now, sure we have our own model train at home and there is a place 10 minutes from our house that has 15 model trains and is way cooler, but at this point I am taking any victory and celebrating it.

Great news! B loved the trains and cheered up for a bit! That’s it, we did it, we snapped him out of it and we will have a fun trip! We watched the trains for a while and then I noticed over in the corner there is a huge locomotive that kids can actually sit in! I tried to entice B over and eventually he bit. But of course he didn’t care about that at all and instead wanted to play on the train table they have in the corner. And by that I mean the absolute shittiest train table I’ve ever seen. Can’t hold a candle to the one we have AT HOME. The thing is a piece of plywood on four 2×4′s with one figure eight track that goes around. It’s also like 6 feet tall so B can barely reach and I wonder who in the world their target audience is with that thing. But again, he was happy for a moment, so we took it. I even stole the opportunity, while he was happy-ish to go pee with F still in the ergo. It was a success (as in F did not wake up, the peeing part is usually successful for me thanks for asking) and I mentally high five myself. We will get through this. I am supermom.


He appears happy here because I wanted the picture (we will at least have fake happy memories godammit) and he thought it was funny to repeatedly climb out of the engineer’s seat.


The random pebbles they threw on there really added to the realness of it all.

Then it was time to leave and my mom and I agreed we needed to buy some sort of train something. No one wanted to go back to that hotel room without a distraction. Luckily they were selling the same crappy train that they had on the crappy train table so we took it and ran. During this time I’d managed to look up every local restaurant and their allergen information. I found a McDonald’s right around the corner and their nuggets don’t have dairy or soy, hooray! I wondered if maybe the problem was hangriness and perhaps with some exciting new food, rather than my boring packed meals, the beast would eat. Naively, I just hoped that with a little train and a little food we would get through the night.

This is so so long already, and if you’re still reading then at least the experience of getting this far has probably somewhat mimicked what it was like to actually live this story. I’ll summarize by just saying the short car ride was A DISASTER. I hopped out of the car while my mom stayed in with the boys (freeeeeedom! even if just for a minute!) I thought it’s McDonald’s, the very epitome of FAST food. About a million scream-filled minutes later (scream filled for my mom I mean, I just watched through the window) I walked out with a happy meal. I threw half of the fries on the ground and gave the rest to my mom because they have dairy (whyyyy??) and couldn’t let B see them. He of course screamed about the happy meal and didn’t want it etc. At that point it was just becoming background noise. Super grating, incredibly frustrating, background noise.

Finally we arrive back at the room, with both kids screaming. I suppose F can only be dragged around for so long without voicing his opinion on the topic, which, I mean, good for him, but OMG. My mom and I chowed down on some allergen free packed dinner while B opened his new train and non-stop bitched about it and all of the things that were supposedly wrong with it. Aaaaaaaaaa. I was so close to losing it at this point but I know we all had to eat. So we did. No improvement.

I showed B the bed we would be sleeping in and ask if he wanted to sleep there or if he wanted to go home. I had made several threats to go home by this point and realized I was getting dangerously close to having to follow through on them simply to maintain credibility. He said he wanted to stay there and then minutes later started whimpering and asking if the bed is the same as home etc. My PTSD from all of our travel experiences prior started to flare up and I remembered the nights spent pacing tiny hotel rooms with a screaming baby/toddler like some sort of Sisyphean nightmare. I told everyone that was it and we were packing up and going home. So we did. And it was every bit as horrible as unpacking the car.

Saturn was never used, like 99%of the other things we packed.

Saturn was never used, like 99%of the other things we packed.

Surprisingly though (well surprisingly to me as I NEVER LEARN but really not surprisingly at all if you spend one second thinking about it) B’s mood improved 1000% once we decided to go home. He was fine. Totally fine. All he had wanted that whole time was to be home.

We drove home and the kids went to bed like little angels and slept like little angels. Then the next morning, completely wrecked, I stumbled out to the kitchen to make my coffee only to discover that the Keurig didn’t survive the trip. It was dead. The final casualty of the entire horrid experience. The one piece of good news was the hotel let us cancel the second night of the reservation. So in summary we packed for 2 days, sacrificed my favorite and most needed possession, drove 100000 hours (in perceived time not reality), paid for a hotel suite we didn’t sleep in, and almost lost our minds just to play on a plywood train table and purchase a dinky train which has already been forgotten about.

Can't imagine what wore them out.

Can’t imagine what wore them out.

Bros over Nos

B is the best big brother. It almost excuses his earlyyyyyy morning wake-ups. (Is it morning if he wakes up for the day before G has gone to sleep for the night?) Anyways, here is a video of B teaching F how to talk. I die.

And because I have to talk about allergies, here is the latest list of F’s yeses and nos. We have scheduled an appointment with an allergist. I’m going to look for the diamond accented Rolls Royce in the parking lot, since based on the time I had to wait merely to speak to a receptionist at her office, this lady is doing ok.

This list sits on the counter and has been added to by others, which was very confusing, so I had to label it at the top.

This list sits on the counter and has been added to by others, which was very confusing, so I had to label it at the top.


Bad blogger! We are alive although this blog doesn’t seem to be. To the extent I’ve been on the Internet lately it’s been to obsessively Google allergies and obsess over health issues that are really not all that serious but have still taken over my brain. Also now I’m Googling toddler insomnia a lot. Is that even a thing? We were up for the day today at 2 am so I’m thinking yes, it is.

The insomnia thing doesn’t require a vivid imagination to picture. Basically there isn’t a lot of sleeping going on which is strange and seemingly out of the blue. Despite his first two years, B has actually been a great sleeper for a while now so I’m not sure what is going on there. I will say that the 2 hours spent in bed today listening to the Pandora Lullaby station would’ve been lovely under other circumstances though. Sort of like a really tired spa vibe, punctuated by cries from a baby who is also sleeping poorly.

Maybe it's the fatigue but I uncontrollably giggle every time I see this shirt.

Maybe it’s the fatigue but I uncontrollably giggle every time I see this shirt.

On the allergy front, we are trying some reflux meds with B to see how that goes. (The insomnia started before that so I don’t think they are related.) Giving medicine to a toddler is sort of like sticking your head in a lion’s mouth under the best of circumstances, so again I probably don’t need to paint a vivid picture of what that’s like with a toddler who has been waking up between 2 and 4 am every day.

Early bird gets the train.

Early bird gets the train.

We finally got F to a happy place on my diet of 6 foods (squash, potatoes, bananas, pears, coconut, and peanuts). They did a test for microscopic blood just to confirm everything was happy, which he passed. I cried because I was so relieved. Then I gave him the prescribed iron drops because all the bleeding has depleted his iron stores somewhat and guess what! It made him bleed again. So I cried again. Now his doc is trying to find another supplement that won’t do that, which is hard since we don’t know exactly what he is reacting to in the drops anyways. And in the meantime I’m continuing on my exciting diet. At this point if he starts bleeding again we don’t really have a good option to replace iron so I really don’t want him to bleed again. I have made a few small changes, however, which have gone fine. I added in dates so I can have peanut butter cookie Larabars, and I added in wine for mental health.

Allergy update

There is good news and bad news with both boys.

B is doing a lot better! Ever since I took him to the doc for a height/weight check he has been eating what appears to be a semi-normal toddler amount. So either he’s been f@%#ing with me this whole time and finally realized he pushed me too far when I was going to test him for Celiac, or something changed.

Coincidentally (or not?) that same visit was when the doc told me to cut soy out of my diet for F. Probably B stopped getting most soy then too since he eats a lot of what I eat. Then after about a week of great eating and me scratching my head, he had a soy hot chocolate from Starbucks. Two hours later he had some obvious tummy troubles, and then basically didn’t eat for the next 2 days. As soon as that was over he was back to consuming almost enough calories to live on. So, until he proves me wrong again, I’m going with the theory that he has not only a dairy allergy/issue, but a soy one as well. The good news there is (maaaaybe?) we figured it out. His mission on this planet is to make me crazy and shave years off my life though, so I’m not putting a lot of stock in this diagnosis at this point. I’m just excited that for now he is eating something. The bad news is if it was the soy then I basically poisoned him for almost 3 years.

He was sent by aliens to test the limits of maternal sanity. This device is how he uploads data to the mother-ship at night.

He was sent by aliens to test the limits of human maternal sanity. This device is how he uploads data to the mother-ship at night.

Speaking of poisoning my kids, F is still having issues. They even seemed to be getting worse not better after I cut out dairy, soy, wheat/gluten, eggs, corn, and tree nuts. Then I ate a ton of gluten-free Rice Krispies mixed with rice protein powder (don’t be jealous!) and his body completely revolted. Now in the traditional allergy world rice is supposed to be super safe and hypoallergenic so wtf. Basically though his reaction was so bad that the doc was saying we needed to test him for anemia and put him on “hypoallergenic” formula immediately if it continued. So since I want to keep nursing him (for reasons I’ll go into another time) and I think we can eventually get to the bottom of this, I’ve gone on an elimination diet. Dr. Sears has a popular one, I mean “popular” with the really small group of moms who have to go down this road, but it is rice based and requires meat so no thanks. I made up my own and it includes bananas, pears, coconut, squash, potatoes, and peanuts. Basically I’m eating just that (plus coffee and diet sierra mist because sanity) and hoping F gets better. Then if he does I can add foods back in one at a time and look for any reaction. I’m keeping a running list of ok foods.

Since taking this pic I've added chocolate, which opens doors to chocolate pb and chocolate coconut milk and coconut ice cream.

Since taking this pic I’ve added chocolate, which opens doors to chocolate PB, chocolate coconut milk and chocolate coconut ice cream.

You would think it would be horrible and I’d be wasting away, but you’d underestimate my ability to eat straight peanut butter for days. I haven’t lost a pound and haven’t totally gotten sick of PB yet so hooray. Fingers crossed he can quit it with the bloody diapers and projectile vomiting. The good news is F is doing better on this diet so far. The really good selfish news is I don’t think I have to cut out peanut butter and change my blog name. The bad news is obviously that this kid has issues with food and introducing solids should be a lot of fun.

"You're not dumb enough to give me rice cereal, are you?"

“You’re not dumb enough to give me rice cereal, are you?”

In case anyone cares here are the common triggers for FPIES. They aren’t your parents’ allergens.



America’s Birthday Party

B asks SO many questions that have complicated answers he really can’t process. Rather than dumbing things down and simplifying, since that never satisfies him anyways, I try to give him a version of the real answer (if I know it) and let him take away from it what he will. But really sometimes the simplified answer is the best one.

Me: Tomorrow is a special day, it’s the 4th of July!
B: What is the 4th of July!? Is it a holiday?
Me: It’s the day we celebrate America!
B: (Blank stare)
Me: It’s the anniversary of the day we declared our Independence from… ehh not gonna go there. It’s the anniversary of when we became a country, well that’s not exactly right but that’s just a simpler way to think about it. I think people might consider the constitutional convention when we officially became a country? … Ummm we will go to a parade and watch fireworks and eat cake!
B: Is America having a birthday party??
Me: Yes. Yes it is. That is exactly how I should’ve explained it to a 2 year old, thank you B.



They’re going to take over the world

F had his two month checkup the other day and is 90th percentile for height and weight, but only 40th for head. B had his growth check and is 10th % for weight , not super tall (percentile depends on how you want to measure the tiger), but 90th for head. (He has gained and grown some, although not tons, so we are refraining from panicking for now to give him some more time.) Anyways, they could not be more differently proportioned, and I can’t stop picturing this:

In this case they are both geniuses of course.

In this case they are both geniuses of course.

Also, the doc said it’s reeeeally rare for kids to have the issues that F does from anything other than soy and dairy so suggested we try probiotics for a few days on the theory that he just hasn’t healed yet from those two things. Guess he’s really special because it isn’t working. Time to eat only tree bark and see if that can help him. Send your favorite vegan, gluten-free, soy-free, corn-free, taste-free recipes! (She did say nut issues were exceedingly rare so I could keep those for now, hooray!)


Turns out the dairy was not enough. Cutting it out made F’s symptoms way better but not totally gone, which means he’s reacting to something else in my diet. Now I’m dairy and soy free in hopes that this helps him. (50ish % of kids who have the dairy issue also have soy issues so this is the best guess as to what the lingering irritant is.) I am also a lifelong vegetarian (not for any particular reason other than I’ve always thought it’s gross, my kids are allowed to eat meat, my family ate meat growing up I just flat out refused starting at 10 months old, etc etc. Yes it’s weird and maybe it’s somehow genetically my fault that my kids can’t eat anything.)

Once you take out meat, dairy, and soy, this does not leave a lot of things I can eat so that’s been fun. The doc said if F’s not better by Monday then either it isn’t soy, or it’s soy and something else on top of the things-that-taste-good-cake. We will pursue other testing to rule out things that are not food allergies/intolerances/whatever, but assuming (hoping?) those are negative then I have a few options. I can do a total elimination diet until his symptoms go away and then slowly add things back in to figure out the problem, or try him on some hypoallergenic formulas (which I’ve heard of FPIES kids reacting to anyways soooo…) Motherhood has turned me into a total hippie so it shouldn’t come as a shock that I might be about to start a diet of rice and tree bark.


Ingredients for a fun weekend!

Ingredients for a fun weekend!

The good news is that coffee and Diet Coke are allergen free. (Unless some heartless, horrible person tells me otherwise?) Don’t think for a second this eating plan is going to force me to make healthy choices.

Good thing they're cute. (And good thing it isn't affecting F's growth!)

Good thing they’re cute. (And good thing it isn’t affecting F’s growth!)

Fingers crossed he is miraculously cured over night and I can proceed with the relative cornucopia of food options on this vegetarian, dairy-free, soy-free diet of mine!